I tend to ruminate – my mind is often turning around ideas, problems, solutions, and even about people. 

While I deeply care about people, I am also very much an introvert and “peopling” can be very draining. I am always trying to “read the room” and figure people out. 

Sometimes it turns me into a porcupine. 

That is probably not ideal. 

It is easy to categorize people and decide who is a friend and who is a foe. The latter category is easy to assign when people don’t think or act like I do, but is that fair, or right? 

I am a better version of myself when I give people the “Benevolence of the doubt”. This means determining to imagine that people have reasons that they believe are good for their actions, thoughts, or ideals. 

This does NOT mean that I have to agree with them on any level. However, choosing to remain curious about why someone might feel a certain way while avoiding assuming that they are just BAD helps me to treat them well and even to change my thoughts about them. 

Rather than turning someone into an enemy in a secret war in my thoughts, I look for the things we have in common. Next, I can look for things that I can celebrate or appreciate. Maybe I don’t agree with someone’s politics, but they are a beautiful musician, or a generous volunteer in the community. Except in rare cases, I can usually find something about a person that I can appreciate and this helps take me from wary to welcoming. 

;

Perhaps Curiosity doesn’t actually kill the cat, but instead makes the world a little kinder.